NICHOLAS CAMPESTRE had given me a clue in POLAND and a big one...his first words upon meeting me were 'maybe you would like to come up and have breakfast with me sometime?'

A 'COLLETTE' typically French breakfast...complete with the same blue/white striped bowls for drinking chocolate out of...he told me about his schooldays and how he had always brought an APPLE in for his teacher...every single day...and I laughed...

That is what had happened to me at that school in PARIS...COLLETTE had given me an apple upon the first day and told me to give it to the teacher...but everything was 'new'...I had a new best friend, new classmates and I was being educated to be a proper little Parisienne girl...a 'lady'...and so I forgot about giving the teacher the apple...the teacher in question had a bag of them by her desk...every school child in the class had brought one in...guess the symbolism...I would say it was about MEMORY and your 'head'...anyway, I was so nervous and got so hungry by 11am that I spotted the apple in my bag and ate it - my new little 'best friend' was alarmed...she told me that they all had to give them to the teacher...

COLLETTE was furious afterwards...she slapped me...she was used to being slapped as a child - it was normal behaviour for families if a child had done wrong...i wasn't used to it and cried my heart out...I wanted to go home...and that evening her jooish neighbour called...he wanted to know why they could hear a child crying...he then bought his finger puppets in to entertain me...he then took me into the darkened living room (the shutters were closed)...and put me on the sofa...I could sleep there (normally I slept on a bed in the kitchen of her apartment)...COLLETTE came in to see him exposing himself to me...she beat him and threw him out of the apartment...she was thinking 'he's just a joo - they are all paedophiles - they can't help it - programmed'...

Anyway, COLLETTE had rung my parents up in the meantime because she didn't understand my reaction to the slap...my mother told my father that I should come home immediately...

...and so about three days later (when the whole thing could be arranged), I was sent home...however, by that point COLLETTE and I had made it up...and I bawled...I didn't want to go home at all...not one bit...i was accustomed to life in that apartment...COLLETTE also cried too and we clung together for a while...I loved the whole thing in the end...the school, the other children...and then coming home to 'tea' with COLLETTE in the evening...she used to give me a plain supper of toast and BRIE cheese...which I loved...I would sit in the small kitchen and look at the sunshine through the open shutters...completely calm and peaceful - whilst COLLETTE went off to sleep/read a book...one evening I took 2 1/2 hours to eat my tea...because I was enjoying every single mouthful...it was an odd experience...I loved being an 'only child' with COLLETTE...I loved not having to fight for food with my brother who hated me and parents who 'didn't care if i lived or died'...I loved being the 'centre of attention' with an authoritarian parent figure...who taught me how to be proper, calm, focussed...all of the little rules and niceties of life...so different from home.

I remember the vocabulary and pronunciation lessons...some children knew so many big and complicated words and I was struggling...they also 'sang' them...singing was a big part of the general education...and that was something that I could do...eventually the teacher had me up front as the 'tuner' for all of the notes...I would simply sing them in all of the variations...to keep the class in tune...

I also remembered the 'revolving doors' and this was what I was able to use in order to defeat MARK R but I still haven't worked it out yet...put simply: to get into the building you had to go ANTI-CLOCKWISE through the doors...and to get out you had to go CLOCKWISE...except that you were then programmed never to remember how to get out again...as if the 'doors had stuck' to go out CLOCKWISE...I learnt how...spinning like a little ballerina...