in GREEN: phedelo

...and now it comes back...my last days at the CIA LAB and how GILL had been set up yet again...he had got this woman pregnant or so he thought...but of course he hadn't...see previous notes in relation to MCDONALD and 'but would it work on him a second time?' e.g. the 'no clothes in Central Park' gag...and unfortunately with GILL...yes, you could play a practical joke on him twice, he never seemed to learn from experience, the first time...perhaps most people don't...but most people tend to start learning, the third or fourth time round...anyway, MARK R and AMADEUS had arranged the usual scenario...another ROCKEFELLER cuckoo that GILL would father...and it worked...and in fact, it worked a third time...he figured that he had fathered two children with her...yes, he was that desperate to have his own children and they knew it. The MOB then blew her and the children up - a 'gas leak' apparently - nothing to do with me - ROZ had discovered it...and then the MOB dealt with the situation.

Yes, it wasn't a 'happy time' at all...I had as good as washed my hands of GILL...upon an emotional basis...he wanted kids...the ill would never let me have them...so just go away and do it but don't bother me, sort of attitude...and I didn't 'look' at all...I didn't want to know...it was ROZ who was bothered about it all 'if they've done it to him once, they'll do it again'...and they had done, two more times, as she was to find out...so I told the MOB...they took action...they didn't want any more of the ROCKEFELLER clan in this world...and that included cuckoos...and I have to say that I entirely agreed with the decision taken - despite the emotional impact upon GILL...who figured (after I had left the CIA LAB) because he wasn't told the truth about it all...that I had been behind it. Fuck off. I am sick to death with all of this now...CAROLINE had told me early on, that everybody has to learn from their own mistakes and sometimes you just have to let people make them...that is the way to learn.