in GREEN: dersun

This morning I wanted to clear up any mystery surrounding ARNOLD’s funeral down in BOGNOR REGIS…I had an inkling that things were still not right…but so far so good…I got my father on the phone this morning, in MANNINGTREE and he told me that EDWIN hadn’t contacted him as yet…maybe because there was a queue, a lot of people dying at the same time in BOGNOR…and I ‘know’ this to be right…and that it is highly likely that the funeral will be on FRIDAY according to ROCKEFELLER plans…their ‘plan B’ as it were…was to screw the family up via the reading of the will…and I still do not know if ARNOLD is really dead or not…but I suspect his father’s goonish sense of humour (see ‘silk tie’ and SOE UFO within previous notes…)…but this is of course a step too far…one shouldn’t torture one’s family with one’s supposed death, if that is the case…which it may not be…that is all I can say…I mean SOPHIE was very close to her father…his ‘favourite’ etc etc…

Anyway, my thoughts then turned to BOGNOR, as a seaside resort to which people often retire…and I then remembered a very PEBBLY East Anglian beach which the CLAYTON grandparents had once taken me to…and GRANDPA had said ominously ‘people come to die here’…and grandma had then modified it in terms of ‘only very old people tend to live around here’…and the whole thing rather freaked me out…it was a very gloomy day and only ‘very old people’ around - this was around the time when I had just left ESSEX…and I replied that my grandparents weren’t that old…they were still active, driving cars etc…to which grandma replied that they were old and would die sooner or later etc etc…

…and I ‘know’ that MARK R was interested in the above…but I cannot remember the seaside resort…so a ‘block’ on it for some reason…

…MARK R loved sitting with OLD LADIES and chatting “because they know so much” he used to say…one of his favourite pastimes…

…and that is how, a deeply hidden memory from SOLIHULL came back - this morning:

DRUCKERS the ‘Viennese cake/café’ on SOLIHULL HIGH STREET.

MARK R used to frequent it to talk to the old people, who used to meet up there for a cake and coffee/tea…it was a general meeting place…

I can remember running away from GILL…after the M&S encounter…frightened out of my mind, in my 8 year old alter…I had been severely tortured and threatened by the ill, never to go near him again…and he had no idea of what was going on…he just wanted to take me back to MANCHESTER…that was during a half-term break…

Anyway, I fled and had a nervous breakdown - halfway down the High Street and held onto a grey metal street-sign pole and began to cry, I was so frightened…an old lady then guided me into DRUCKERS and told me to sit down until I felt better…I sat down…watching the people walk by upon the street…and I saw GILL pass the shop…but I ‘knew’ that he would NEVER look into it…because it was ‘out of bounds’ to him…MARK R’s territory, which he didn’t want GILL to know about…

SUE WHALLEY and her friend JAN used to have a cake and coffee at DRUCKERS at the weekend…and this was considered ‘odd’ by most teenagers….who used to go to the pubs…

Anyway, GILL then got onto his tannoy system…told me that he had made a key for his MANCHESTER flat and that I could pick it up…by that point in time my family were behaving so badly to me…they wouldn’t even allow me to have meals with them…that I immediately asked him if I could have the key that day…he told me that he would meet me halfway down ST BERNARDS ROAD but that he had to stay on with his family for the rest of the week to ‘meet relatives’ etc…so I got the key and the next morning, I was out of the front door like a shot…and then on a train back to MANCHESTER…

It was WINNIE who had sorted it all out for GILL…she had found out that I had been drowned by the ill - and then resuscitated - in the local canal near to where she lived…she took me and GILL down there…to pull that horrible memory up again…and to ‘get my 8 year old alter’ to see reason…to see the situation for what it was…anyway, it all came back in a flood…I then made a run for it…over the fence and allotments…GILL and WINNIE caught up with me on the road…and by that time, I had calmed down…and GILL just hugged me…that is how we ‘made it up’ again…and I regained my memories instead of that alter simply being too terrorised to remember anything and particularly GILL…

A decade or so later, HELEN RODWAY-WILLIAMS was to take me for a walk to that very spot where I had been drowned - see above…instructed to do so by RIMINGTON…probably in an attempt to terrorise me again, into memory dump…it didn’t work…

OTHER NOTES:

The only oddity about my mother’s left message is that it didn’t register upon my phone as a ‘missed call’ yesterday…but it did turn up this morning at around 9am…for a NORTH NORFOLK number but not their cottage number:

01263583659
09 may 14:26

The cottage number that my mother gave me was this:

o1263 824469

OTHER NOTES:

That piano stool and MIKE WEALE…he had wanted that one ‘outed’…he had been programmed with it…he told MCDONALD and myself to take a photo quickly and then leave…we did so…