Thursday, 28 October 2021

 .....and what's new this friday morning, dazzlenation?....well, last night i was to remember a bit more about that brief meeting with 'mr cern' in a prague winebar, before i caught my train back to poland - after that british council DTO interview....in short, he appeared to have set the meeting up, in order to 'wake me up' - regarding my time at cern and the fact that i was a mathematician....for me then to reply that i was too frightened to remember...that they would kill me if etc etc....in point of fact, i was only able to remember for a few seconds, before disassociating in relation to the very 'terror' of it all...anyway, he kept on telling me to try and stay in my body, as it were...to just hold on....but it proved to be impossible....i couldn't....it was all too terrifying...not safe at all...to remember a thing.

...and what else, dazzlenation?....well, there is a bit more that i can now remember about that meeting...lol....and in order to tell you about it...i had better describe the layout of the bar, first...a long and narrow rectangular room....which led straight off of the street...and let me see...to set the scene....it was late morning/midday....the sun was shining brightly through the windows....as i walked in and down the bar, which was on the left....the bar itself, was a long one - with many bar stools....most of them occupied....and there were also a few small round tables to the right....anyway, in order to find a barstool, i had to walk quite a way down that bar....to then sit down....look up...and realise that the mirror behind the bar was fully lit...i noticed my reflection..and then that of 'mr cern' seated by me....a certain shock of recognition perhaps....we began to chat...had we met before in a past life? etc etc....he put his arm around me - nota bene....in a protective way...i pulled away...."it's not unwelcome - it is just that...." ....awkward conversation....he asked me if we were being watched....i replied whilst staring at my reflection and whispering.....that there was a man seated behind us, at one of the round tables...but that he couldn't speak english, only russian and so it was  'okay'....lol...guess who i had spotted?...and there's more....i then added that there was a very dangerous character, seated near to the open frontdoor/window of the bar....just count the barstools from the window....the third one from the left...."there's nobody there" he replied...regarding that 'third man'....having scanned the mirror reflection behind the bar....i giggled into my wine and yes, we had already had a couple of drinks, by that point in time....in huge glasses...."walk down the bar and try and sit on it then"...if there isn't somebody seated upon it...."go on, i dare you!"...he then took up the challenge...guess what happened?...a lot of effing and blinding, in irish...that's what....'mr cern' swiftly returned but not to immediately sit down, by me...he went to talk to the man-behind-us...in russian....that man then got up and tried to do the same thing....more effing and blinding in irish....why were so many men trying to touch him up, that morning?....and yes, now i can see why CF had gone berserk...bawling at 'mr cern'..."what are you doing with her?!?...she's just a whore!"...as i attempted to leave that winebar, in order to catch my train....with 'mr cern' helping me with my luggage...who then stood up for me - yelling at CF to back off or else....and upon seeing that 'dangerous look' in CF eyes, i was then to warn 'mr cern'...."he's got a knife, be careful"....CF in 'little raisa' alter...with a knife-down-his-sock etc etc...'mr cern' alerted the barman 'in russian' and immediately several men moved forward to restrain CF...as we made a swift exit....see previous notes upon 'invisibility'...the ghosts-of-the-system....in relation to mark r at that LSE christmas party, in london.......go figure.

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