OTHER NOTES:

a long and rambling post...to 'get at' something....

SABINA SHARKEY and 'agency'....see previous notes...

how do you define agency?

well start off with the idea of 'limitations' upon your life and your 'free will'....

begin with DEATH.

....and work back....death is the biggest 'limitation' of human life and human agency....start with 'heart attack and cancer'....the two biggest killers (in terms of epidemiology - global studies) at the end of a normal life span...both can limit your lifespan.... 'in the middle of life' as well as in childhood....heart attack and cancer are the two 'biggest things' that carry you off, as a senior citizen....you are most likely to die from either of the two. one is prolonged - the other, is relatively quick. on the other hand, you might 'walk under a bus tomorrow'....which is an indicator of just how frail life is....here today and gone tomorrow.

let us now go back the 'human life scale' to look at other limitations...working backwards, from 'death'....your GPS for example...and 'how much money you have'....the two are interlinked in many ways....for example 'what is your nationality and what is the education system like?'

you can now go further back and in detail....in relation to all sorts of other factors....for example "what about my dependents? how long will i live? what can i do 'in terms of agency'?" etc etc....

you could even 'do a microscopic alice' and talk about 'how to prevent yourself and others from developing diseases that will lead to death - an earlier death than 'what would be expected'....given your GPS location....and 'how much money you have'....

...sabina hadn't wanted to know a 'working definition' of 'agency' as in 'free will'...."because she didn't want to believe that it existed - that free will existed" replies BI ONLINE....anyway, i hope that i have given 'pointers' to it...in the above. yes 'human life' is frail....yes there are many limitations.....and what can one do but 'know one's vocation' from when one is young - to do the best that one can, in the circumstances? whatever circumstances you might have been born into....GPS and 'money'....'available education' etc etc....LA FRANCK is coming up now...what i had channelled from her...thoughts 'in solitude'....

anyway, i was told by the BRITISH ROYALS and at 16 years old that i would never ever find a job in this country....a big limitation....in relation to not realising that i 'knew' french in a child alter - and fluently....as well as a smattering of italian and arabic....in short, i had to go abroad and 'survive' somehow - only knowing english as a language....as a 30 year old woman (and with no money - nothing in the bank) or else my life would be 'the dog's end of a..." as tomlinson was to tell me - just before i finally decided...'to make the move' and go abroad to teach TEFL....whilst knowing that BI ran TEFL teachers as 'fodder' for so many things...."the mod had run you all, as that" replies MI5 ONLINE....the worst of it all, being...a pornography trade, in snuff movies, as far as i can remember...women raped and then strangled.....see previous notes.

limitations....one always has a way to work around them, doesn't one? if you have the 'will' that is...if it has not been physically beaten out of you...and the ill were never able to anally rape - or beat it out of me....oh and yes i had ended up a very 'shy' character....reserved and withdrawn, during my senior school years....but that had never really been 'me' - had it? i am a retrospective and introspective sort of person....but that doesn't mean that i cannot be 'social' - far from it......funny how i have had to survive to 52 years old (my real age) to talk about all of this...

oh....let us go back in time...to 14 years old...and sue whalley in a maths class...and after learning....that the class had just decided to divide themselves up, according to a new questionnaire.... into 'extrovert' (GOOD) and 'inrtrovert' (BAD)....sue was to exclaim, in a very loud voice...and to the whole of the class...'star of the show, tim' (why did i miss the 'e' off time?)...having read the 'questionnaire'....."thank GOD i am an introvert...that's me....that's definitely me!...that's what i'm like...i HATE team games, i HATE sport....i would rather be on my own for...'significant periods of time'....LOTS OF TIME.....i like watching snowflakes falling..... through the window pane...i could watch it for hours....with my cocoa, sitting beside the fire".....

'star of the show, tim/time'....

sue used to call tomlinson 'tim'....tim and 'time'....

anyway, that is another reason as to why i loved sue whalley...the netball team was 'useless' as run by melanie griffith....and i had 'no interest' in a team that included 'helen browne'....see previous notes upon her inability to 'catch a ball'....

you have to be yourself....micro-to macro....and from the micro....you have to choose which teams you play for.....

the limitations of life....

'death is the biggest limitation of all'....

....and what about when you 'start out in life'? what is the biggest limitation of all then?

BI ONLINE is now talking about 'starting life' with 'something really serious'....particularly something that wasn't natural.....such as thalidomide cases.....

and if you didn't have 'that'....... well, once you are about 4/5 years old.... it is then 'gangs/mafias/teams' isn't it?

who do you want to 'play for'? human beings are not 'islands' are they?

look at michael richardson's gang....i have played for them...and for so long...despite what they have all done to me....and would continue to do to me....if i hadn't taken a stand....see previous notes.

LA FRANCK and her idea that 'life is nourished by death'...the thought of death, i suppose...perhaps i have been trying to understand what she had meant by 'that one' rather than the perimeters of what 'agency' might mean (along the lines of 'how many limitations have you got?)...see previous notes upon channelling gill's mother at that prague 'party'....the one that milan kundera was to attend....

tomlinson....tim and time....now i can begin to talk about 'what was to happen this morning' and 'in pictures'....